Our philosophy

We are proud of our approach towards female desire because we believe it sets us apart from so many other sites about increasing libido.

Our Values and Philosophy

  • Non-Judgemental
  • Feminist
  • Inclusive
  • Empowering


We believe that our sex drives ebb and flow in response to what’s going on in our lives

It is totally normal to not want sex– whether that’s temporary, or on a longer term basis.

Some women are asexual, demi-sexual, or just A-OK with having no or low desire- and there’s NO JUDGEMENT there from us!


We also come from a FEMINIST PERSPECTIVE. A lack of desire is often so medicalised and individualised that many women feel there’s something wrong with them if their libido vanishes.


It makes total sense to us that *so* many women experience fading desire in a Long Term Relationship.

That’s because we live in a world where female sexuality is misunderstood. Much of what we’ve been told about desire is wrong, and often women experience more barriers to access and express their sexual desire (because of sexism, racism, ableism etc). So we’re here to redress the balance and break the silence on the truth about female sexuality and desire.


This site is aimed at self-identified women/womxn and is inclusive of members of the non-binary and transgender communities. However you identify, you are welcome here. 

We also aim to challenge multiple forms of oppression that women experience- e.g. racism, sexism, ableism- and that intersect with their experiences and narratives that surround their own sexuality.

We also know that there is so much pressure EVERYWHERE to look a certain way to be sexy because of social beauty standards. So, we promise to make every effort to represent all different body shapes, races, ages, abilities and much more! 

This site will also ALWAYS have free content because we believe every woman deserves to have great sex.


And finally/most importantly, we take an EMPOWERING approach to sexuality. We believe that all women should have the choice to express themselves sexually however they wish. And if they choose to be sexually active, we want them to have the power to lead a life that is pleasure filled, sexually empowered and sensually vibrant. 

In love and solidarity,

The Desired State Team



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