mood mindset desire sex anxiety depression body confidence
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Our mental and emotional well-being is key to having a good sex drive. 

Any change in stress, pressure, anxiety, depression or difficulties in feeling confident in our bodies can all really impact on how much we feel like having sex.

If you’re reading this and you think your libido has been impacted by your mental health or mood, below I’ve put together a collection of the best tips I know (tried and tested by me!) for how to improve your well-being and recover your lost desire….

However, to note first is please do consult your GP or sexual health clinic if you are experiencing issues with your mood and/or mindset where appropriate. 

I am not a medical or mental health professional (or an expert!) so do take any resources or advice given here with a pinch of salt. *Not literally either*. There is no shame in seeking help and support. 

Step One: Knowledge is power

I’ve written in much more depth here about how (and why) your mindset impacts on desire, which I’d really recommend checking out first. 

The more you know and understand what impacts on your desire and how, the easier it is to understand the logic about why.

Exploring more in particular about how our biology works to shut down desire when we’re stressed or anxious can help you find the means of understanding more about your own body and what’s happening. These are known as our “sexual brakes”-figuring out what yours are is the best place to begin. 

You can read more about why stress closes down desire and how anxiety impacts on your libido here.


Step two: Exercise

As much as is pains me to say this (seeing as I’m an absolutely couch potato at heart) but exercise is one of the best ways to get back a low sex drive if it’s being impacted by stress and anxiety. 

That’s because our desire for sex is literally biologically closed down when we feel under pressure. And exercise tricks our bodies into believing we’re safe and burning off that weight we carry. 

You can read more about why this happens with exercise and tips on how to incorporate it into your life here.

Step three: manage anxiety outside of the bedroom first

Anxiety creeps up on us like a fog and it can be hard to shake it off once we’re in it. 

I suffer quite badly with anxiety, so here’s my unusual tips on how you can try and keep your anxiety under control. 

Dealing with worried thoughts outside of when you’re having sex can really help to improve your sex drive overall.

Stay present monkey mind sex sexless worry anxiety performance mental chatter

Step four: Learn how to stay present inside of the bedroom

Getting “in the zone” for sex can be really difficult! And it’s SO frustrating to be laid there trying to get jiggy when thoughts are zooming around your busy mind and it’s almost impossible to focus on the task at hand.

Fear not though- I’ve developed a guide on “How to Stay Present During Sex” to help you slip out of your own head and into pleasure.

Want to go deeper?

There is SO much more to cover in this section about how to manage your mind and improve your sex drive. 

Dive in to the blog to find out more tips, tricks and guidance around mental health and sex.

Are there any tips you can share about how you manage your mental health?

♥ Leave your comments below ♥